Does this sound familiar?

You're staring at your phone at 2am, replaying that conversation from yesterday for the hundredth time.

"I should have said..."
"What if they thought..."

"Maybe I came across as..."

The thoughts loop endlessly in your mind, each cycle making you feel worse than the last.

Your brain feels stuck, like a record that keeps skipping back to the same few seconds of a song.

Over and over and over.

This is called rumination – and if you have ADHD, you're probably all too familiar with these thought spirals.

In this post, we’ll explore why ADHD makes you prone to rumination, and more importantly, what you can do to break free from these endless mental loops.

If you prefer to listen rather than read, listen to episode 247 of the Motherhood in ADHD Podcast.

What is Rumination?

Rumination is the tendency to repeatedly focus on the same distressing thoughts or problems without moving toward solutions.

Rumination is much more intense than fleeting worries or concerns. When you're ruminating, your thoughts become:

Repetitive and hard to control
Increasingly negative as time goes on
Focused on problems rather than solutions
Overwhelming and anxiety-producing

There are two types of rumination:

Anxious rumination - constantly playing out "what-if" scenarios and imagining worst-case outcomes. For example: “What if I get in a car accident?”

Negative rumination - replaying past events and beating yourself up over perceived mistakes or shortcomings. For example: “I can’t believe I said that; I’m so stupid!”

And while rumination isn't exclusive to people with ADHD, our unique brain wiring makes us especially susceptible to these thought spirals. Let’s explore why.

Helpful Resource: ADHD Anti-Anxiety Workshop

Why Are People With ADHD Prone to Rumination?

People with ADHD don't just occasionally ruminate – our brains seem perfectly designed for getting stuck in these mental loops. And there are several reasons why.

Hyperactive ADHD Brains Never Stop

ADHD-rumination type girl with background with ideas everywhere

Our ADHD brains are like high-performance engines that don't come with an "off" switch.

You’re probably used to racing thoughts and ideas constantly bouncing around your brain like ping pong balls.

So when a worrying thought catches your attention, your hyperactive brain latches on tight and doesn't want to let go.

This constant mental activity makes it easier to get caught in repetitive thought patterns. When your brain is already moving at full speed, it's harder to slow down and shift to a different track.

Emotional Intensity & Sensitivity

ADHD affects more than your attention and focus – it also impacts your ability to process emotions.

We tend to feel things more intensely than our neurotypical friends. What might be a minor worry for someone else can feel like an emotional tsunami for your ADHD brain.

This heightened sensitivity means you're more likely to get caught up in emotional responses and replay them over and over.

Emotional Dysregulation

ADHD also makes it harder to regulate those intense emotions.

Think of emotional regulation like a thermostat for your feelings. Neurotypical brains can usually adjust the temperature up or down as needed. But when you have ADHD, your emotional thermostat sometimes gets stuck on "high," making it difficult to cool down those heated thoughts and feelings.

No Mental “White Space”

Our busy ADHD brains are often running at maximum capacity – there's very little breathing room or "white space" in our mental landscape.

When your mind is already crowded with tasks, responsibilities, and racing thoughts, there's no buffer zone between you and intrusive thoughts.

This lack of mental white space means that when a worrying thought does pop up, it doesn't have anywhere else to go. So it sits there, taking up precious mental real estate and growing bigger by the minute. (Especially at bedtime, because you didn’t process it during the day!)

Slow Processing Speed

It's happened to all of us – someone makes a rude comment, and you think of the perfect response... three hours later in the shower.

ADHD often comes with slower processing speed, especially in social situations.

While our thoughts race quickly in some areas, processing emotional or social information takes extra time. This delay between experiencing something and fully processing it can lead to rumination.

When someone says something that bothers us, we might not be able to respond effectively in the moment. Instead, we replay the interaction over and over, thinking of all the things we could have or should have said.

Understanding these ADHD traits helps explain why we're so susceptible to rumination. But more importantly, it reminds us that getting caught in thought spirals isn't a personal failure – it's a natural consequence of how our brains are wired.

How to Stop an ADHD Rumination Spiral (8 Tips That Actually Work!)

Now that you know why rumination happens to ADHDers like us, let’s talk about how to break out of those dreadful rumination spirals!

It’s important to note that addressing rumination is not about controlling or stopping your thoughts – it’s about interrupting them when you can, and managing them when you can’t.

Let’s get into 8 strategies you can use when you find yourself stuck in a thought loop.

1. Avoid Triggers

Prevention is the best medicine when it comes to rumination – and that means identifying and avoiding your personal triggers.

With ADHD, we're already more susceptible to getting caught in thought spirals. Steering clear of situations that typically spark rumination helps preserve our limited mental energy for more important things.

Start tracking what sets off your rumination cycles. Notice patterns like:

Scrolling social media before bed leads to comparing yourself to others
Checking work email late at night triggers anxiety about tomorrow
Certain people, conversations that leave you replaying interactions

Once you spot these patterns, create boundaries. Set a cutoff time for social media. Move difficult conversations to times when you feel more grounded.

Also – avoid “vampire people” – people who suck the life out of you. These people only talk about themselves (and it’s usually a lot of the same drama). Their selfishness and lack of concern for your own issues can be a huge rumination trigger.

2. Get It Out of Your Head

Those swirling thoughts in your mind need somewhere else to go – somewhere outside your busy brain.

ADHD brains often get overwhelmed by the sheer volume of thoughts. Writing or speaking them aloud gets them out of your brain, clearing some space and allowing you to see them more objectively.

Keep a dedicated rumination journal by your bed. When thoughts start spinning, write everything down, especially before sleep (when rumination often rears its ugly head).

Remember: the point of journaling isn’t to write pretty or even to make sense! It’s to get this chatter out of your head so you can be at peace.

If writing feels like too much, try voice notes on your phone. Or find a quiet moment alone and speak your thoughts out loud: "I'm worried about this situation because..." Saying your thoughts out loud can help you process them and feel a better sense of closure.

Speaking of talking out loud, you can also talk to a friend about the issue you’re ruminating about to get their opinion. Just make sure they are a “neutral” party and not someone involved directly with the issue (so they’ll see the issue more objectively).

3. Recognize and Redirect

Catching yourself in a rumination spiral takes practice. But there’s good news: your brain can learn new patterns.

This process is called neuroplasticity: your brain's ability to form new neural pathways through repeated practice.

When you consistently redirect your ruminating thoughts to more productive ones, you're actually rewiring your brain.

For ADHD minds that tend to get stuck in loops, this creates new escape routes.

Start building this awareness by checking in with yourself throughout the day. When you notice rumination starting, try this:

Label it: "I'm ruminating about my kid’s grades again"
Choose a new focus: "Instead of worrying about his grades, I’m going to write down a few ways I can help him and create an action plan"
Set a timer for 10 minutes to work on your chosen task

When you start a habit of recognizing rumination and redirecting your mind to something more productive, your brain will start doing this more naturally and effortlessly in the future.

4. Use Mindfulness Techniques

Your thoughts aren't always facts. Sometimes they're just mental activity passing through your mind.

For ADHD brains that feel everything intensely, creating some distance from our thoughts can be life-changing.

Practice observing your thoughts without getting tangled up in them. This is often called mindfulness, but you don’t have to sit cross-legged and meditate to do it!

For example, when you have the worry “My friend never responded to my text, she’s mad at me!”, notice it, and make this little tweak:

"I notice I'm having the thought that my friend is mad at me."

Notice how the second version creates a little distance between yourself and the thought? It’s also a reminder that it’s not necessarily true that your friend is mad at you, you’re just having a thought about it.

It’s important to remember that having weird or worrying thoughts is normal. Your brain is doing its job trying to protect you. The problem isn't having these thoughts - it's getting stuck in them.

5. Take Reasonable Action

Sometimes rumination is telling you something needs attention.

Especially for ADHD brains that process emotions intensely, taking action can provide relief when worry is warranted.

Before you spiral into hours of overthinking, ask yourself: "Is there something specific I can do about this situation?"

Maybe you misinterpreted your friend's tone in a group chat. Instead of replaying the interaction for days, send a quick message: "Hey, just checking in. I felt like something was off earlier. Can we talk?"

While this may seem terrifying if you’re conflict averse, think about how painful and distressing it is to ruminate over this issue. I guarantee the possible conflict isn’t nearly as emotionally draining and time-consuming as your rumination about it.

6. Distract Yourself

When there's nothing practical you can do, strategic distraction can break you out of the trance of rumination.

This works especially well for ADHD minds that thrive on novelty and engagement.

The most effective distraction is spending time with other people – social interaction naturally pulls you out of your head.

Watching a movie or TV show may seem like an easier distraction method, but if you’re a master ruminator, you know that only half of your brain will watch the show, while the other half will still be ruminating in the background!

If social distraction isn’t possible at the moment, try asking yourself unexpected questions that interrupt the thought loop:

"What else is happening right now that I'm not noticing?"
"What would I rather be feeling instead?"
"What color are my socks right now?"

The key is getting your brain out of the pattern it’s in and into a new one. It’s not easy, but it is possible!

7. Plan for the Future

Instead of endlessly replaying past situations, channel that energy into preparing for similar moments in the future.

This is especially helpful for those of us with slower processing speed who struggle to respond in the moment.

Create simple scripts for common situations:

When someone makes an insensitive comment: "I need a moment to process what you just said."

When you're caught off guard in a meeting: "That's an interesting point. Let me think about it and circle back."

The goal here isn't to have a perfect response every time – it's to feel more prepared and confident in handling similar situations when they arise.

Bonus tip: Taking an improv class can be a game-changer for us slow-processors. It allows you to practice thinking on your feet and respond spontaneously in a low-pressure environment.

8. Let Rumination Run Its Course

Sometimes you simply can't force rumination to stop – and that's okay.

Especially with ADHD, fighting against our minds often makes things worse.

When someone makes a rude comment or you make a mistake at work, those thoughts might need some time to process.

And fighting them can actually make them stick around longer.

Recognize that you’re ruminating, and tell yourself: “I’m ruminating right now and that’s okay and normal. It will pass eventually.”

Ask yourself: "Will this matter in a month? A week? Tomorrow?" This helps put the situation in perspective without dismissing your feelings.

Consider setting a time limit: "I'll let myself think about this for the next 20 minutes, then I'm going to make dinner." This gives your brain permission to process while maintaining healthy boundaries.

Don't Let ADHD Rumination Ruin Your Day

Living with ADHD means our thoughts sometimes feel like they're running the show.

But rumination doesn't have to control your life.

Whether you choose to prevent triggers, redirect your thoughts, or simply let the storm pass while planning for next time, you have more power than you think.

Remember – your brain isn't broken, it's just wired differently.

Getting caught in thought spirals isn't a personal failure – it's a natural part of having an ADHD brain.

The key is learning to work with your brain instead of against it.

Want to better understand how ADHD affects your mind and emotions? Are you curious to see if you might have ADHD? Download my free resource: "ADHD in Women: A Checklist of Common Symptoms". If you see yourself in this list, you may choose to address your ADHD and get the help you deserve.

ADHD Rumination: How to Stop Obsessive Thought Spirals